


The Misadventures of an Instant Irondad

by Greach



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Adoption, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Avengers Tower, Babies, Baby Peter Parker, Babysitting, Car Accidents, Death, Depression, Drug Use, F/M, Infertility, Lipstick & Lip Gloss, Murder, Panic Attacks, Paparazzi, Post-Avengers (2012), Tabloids, Thor (Marvel) is a Good Bro, Timeline What Timeline, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark Has Daddy Issues, Tony Stark Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-01-22
Updated: 2019-01-22
Packaged: 2019-10-14 15:49:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17511452
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Greach/pseuds/Greach
Summary: After learning about Bucky killing his parents, Tony Stark falls down a path of depression and alcoholism. One drunken night he stumbles upon a horrific scene, he find something or someone that changes his life.





	The Misadventures of an Instant Irondad

**Author's Note:**

> Brief Character Description.
> 
> Tony Stark~ Depressed, kinda an alcoholic, worrisome, stressed like Zac Efron in High School Musical 3
> 
> Peter Parker~ a legit baby, no seriously he’s like 2 months old. His parents didn’t feel so good when they died ;)
> 
> Pepper Potts~ Always worried about Tony, she’s cool and smart.
> 
> Thor~ Not the best babysitter, constantly loses the baby and gets him into bad scenarios. Oops. Kinda dumb, but he’s hot so it’s okay. Will leave the baby at a bar
> 
> Happy- does not like babies. Nothing good ever happens to him...just like my life.

* * *

_59 new messages from Pepper. 20 missed calls._

Tony sighed as he sat on a cold bench in Queens New York. It was like any other November night, full of rain and wind. Tony glanced at his phone and watched the time change to 9:54, along with another message from Pepper. Tony scratched the back of his head and took another drink from his half empty beer bottle. The sour, fermented flavor burned the back of his throat as the light from his phone glowed onto his large eye bags. He shook his head opened his messages.

_Pepper: Tony, where are you?_

_Pepper: Why aren't you answering my calls? Are you okay?_

_Pepper: Fuck! You do this every night! You better not come home drunk again!_

_Pepper: Who are you with?!_

_Pepper: Tony, stop playing games! Just tell me who you are with! Stop hiding everything from me!_

_Pepper: Come home!_

_Pepper: YOU CAN’T KEEP DOING THIS TO ME!!!_

Tony shivered and stuffed his phone into his pocket and stood up from the wet bench. He glanced at the blue car, safely driving past him and the motorcycle reckless driving beside them. BANG! Tony jumped and dropped his beer bottle on the sidewalk and listened to the sharp whistle coming from the car’s blown out tire. The car’s tire scraped against the pavement beforing smashing into wall; the car going up in flames. The motorcyclist locked eyes with Tony before fleeing the scene.

Suddenly, Tony heard a baby’s cries coming from the crashed car. A man and a woman were struggling to reach the child from the front seat, but they had been nearly crushed from the debris. Tony hesitated, contemplating whether or not he should get involved. His vision wasn’t the best, considering he was a bit drunk, but he stumbled over to the crash anyway.

“Hey, are you guys alright!?” Tony yelled.

The man in driver’s seat was bleeding excessively from his forehead. He reached out for Tony, and grabbed onto Tony’s jacket.

    “Please...please help my son. He’s...in the back. D-Don’t let him die...he’s my only son. Please…”

Tony peeked his head into the back, and there he saw a small baby boy strapped in a car seat. The baby was crying, and Tony noticed that the baby’s right leg had been twisted in the wrong direction. Tony tried to open the back door, but it wouldn’t budge. The flames began to travel all around the car, and Tony knew that it was only a matter of a few seconds before the car would explode. Knowing he had to act fast, Tony wrapped his jacket around his arm, and smashed through the window. The window shattered, and Tony reached inside to unbuckle the baby from his car seat. The remaining shards of glass in the window cut through Tony’s shirt, but Tony’s body was full of adrenaline, so he didn’t notice. After struggling with the seat buckle for a few seconds, Tony finally got the baby free, and pulled him out of the car. Tony felt a hand on his shoulder, and he turned to the man in the front seat.

    “Please...take care of him.” said the man before he took his final breath.

    Tony looked down at the screaming baby and ran down the street. Suddenly the car exploded, obliterating everything around it. Tony gasped as the baby started to cry even louder from the loud noise.

    “Lets.. get you to the hospital.” said Tony as he wrapped the baby in his mint green blanket. It started to rain even harder as Tony got closer to the hospital. He jumped through the pristine automatic doors. “Hey! I need a doctor! This baby is hurt!”  
    “Wait a moment, aren’t you Tony Stark!?”

    “Tony Stark is here? Where!?”

    “I am so putting this on my Snapchat.”

    “Why is he holding a baby? Mr. Stark, is that baby yours?”

Tony was visibly annoyed, and ignored the people beginning to surround him.

    “Someone please just help me out here! This kid needs help!”

    “Uh sir, we need you to fill out some forms first.” said the disgruntled nurse.

    “I don’t need a fucking forms! This baby is fucking bleeding and his leg is broken! Get me a fucking doctor!”

    “Sir, we need you to calm down…”

    Suddenly, a doctor stepped out from one of the rooms and looked at Tony. “What seems to be the problem sir?

    “The baby!” screamed Tony as he shoved the baby into the doctor's arms.

    The doctor gulped and awkwardly stepped into a room. Leaving Tony in the waiting room. About three hours passed and the doctor came back with the sleeping child who now had a pink cast on his leg. “Okay. Mr.Stark. He he does have a broken leg and he has some severe bruising around his ribs. We sutured up his lacerations, now we just have to wait. His leg will take about 8 weeks to heal,but until then make sure her is well rested and has lots of fluids. Oh another thing, try to prevent hims from crying too much, it will make his bruises hurt even more. Alright, let's get him discharged.” suddenly the Doctor froze and cocked his eyebrow. “You are his guardian right?”

    “Ya, he’s uh my pupil.” said Tony before leaving the hospital.

Suddenly, Tony heard screeching tires from outside the entrance of the hospital. Within a few seconds, a massive group of paparazzi poured inside, heading straight for Tony.

    “Mr. Stark! Mr. Stark! What are you doing at the hospital at this time of night?”

    “Mr. Stark! Is it true that you came here with a baby? Is the child yours? Mr. Stark!”

“Mr. Stark, did you have this child with Mrs. Stark? Or are you having an affair?”

    “Move!” yelled Tony as he knocked some of them down like a football player. He held the baby close to his chest and dashed in the direction of Stark Tower. He quickly pulled his from from his back pocket and quickly speed dialed Happy. “Hey I need you to get someone to drive me asap!” before Happy could reply, Tony hung up.

A few minutes passed and a black Ferrari pulled up to the curb. Tony released a sign of relief and quickly jumped into the backseat. His heart was pounding like a drum as he quickly buckles his seatbelt. Once settled, Happy started driving not knowing about the baby Tony was holding.

Tony glanced down at the sleeping baby and traced his fingers across the plush mint green fleece. On the corner of the blanket, he noticed some intricate, brown embroidery that read _Peter Parker - September 27th 2018._

“It’s okay little guy, I'm here.” mumbled Tony.

Happy cocked an eyebrow and his cheeks glowed a bright pink. “Uh Mr. Stark? Did you just call me little guy?”

“Oh uh ya! You're my little guy Happy!”

“Whatever you say boss.”

    The car ride was quiet as he kept the baby wrapped in his arms. They got back to Stark Tower and Tony opened his car door and hid the baby. “It’s ok Happy, I got the door myself. I um… Im going to bed. Oh and I’m making a new tradition, no one can watch the news for a week. Okay goodnight!” Before Happy could reply, Tony dashed inside and hid in one of the guest rooms instead of going into his and Pepper’s room.

    Tony laid Peter on the bed and gently placed the green baby blanket on him. “I guess I need to stay here tonight...I don’t want you rolling off the bed little guy.” Tony laid on the bed beside little baby Peter and sighed. “I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I don’t know how Pepper will react to this, and honestly I’m too afraid to find out.” Peter’s tiny hands reached out to Tony, and grabbed onto one of Tony’s fingers and held on tight. Tony smiled, and closed his eyes. He tried to get some sleep before the morning, but he was too anxious. He looked out the window again, and saw the sunrise. “Well, I can already feel the bags under my eyes.” He looked down at Peter, who was sleeping peacefully next to him. Suddenly, Tony heard knocking on the door. “Tony, are you in there?”

    Tony’s eyes widened and he stared back at the baby. “Uh just a minute! I’m naked!” Tony wrapped up the baby and carefully stuffed him under the bed. “Ok you can come in.”

    Happy stepped inside and took a look at Tony’s massive eye bags. “Hey? You okay?”

    “Uh ya, I’m perfectly fine”

    “Okay well Pepper wanted me to tell you that the therapist is here.”

    Tony cocked an eyebrow and crossed his arms. “When did I call for a therapist?” Tony said sternly.

    “You didn’t. Pepper is worried about...your...addiction. Anyway hurry out to the office okay. Oh and just a warning, Pepper is pretty pissed at you.”

    “Oh great.” suddenly baby Peter whimpered like he was about to cry. Tony tensed up and pushed Happy out the door. “Okay thanks for stopping by!” Tony slammed the door and leaned against the wall as hungry Peter was getting ready to cry. Tony grabbed Peter out from under the bed and cradled him in his arms. Peter started to whimper. “Hey, what’s wrong little guy? Dirty diaper? Uhhh...are you hungry?” Tony checked Peter’s diaper, and it smelled horrible. He had no diapers lying around, so he had to improvise. He ran into the guest bathroom, and took off the diaper. Tony found a long sleeve shirt in one of the guest closets, and used it to make a makeshift diaper. Peter was still close to tears, and Tony knew that he had to find him some food somehow. He thought about taking Peter with him to the store, but he didn’t have a car seat.

    “Shit, what am I supposed to do now?” Tony looked around the room. “Oh, wait! I can just use Postmates! I’ll order some baby formula from Walgreens or some shit.” Tony typed in the information on his phone. He looked at Peter, who he was holding in his arms. “Don’t worry, little guy, I’ll get you something to eat.” Peter looked at him, and whimpered quietly. Tony sat back down on the bed, and waited about 10 minutes for the formula, and the extra bottles he had ordered. When the delivery guy showed up at Stark Tower, Tony ran down to the first floor with Peter in his arms, covered by a snow jacket. Tony looked up, and didn’t believe his eyes. It was Thor, holding the baby bottles and formula.

    “Tony? Tony Stark, is that you? It’s been months!” Thor smiled.

Tony grabbed the formula and baby bottles from Thor’s hands. “Uh, I’m fine. Can you leave now? Don’t you have somewhere better to be?” Thor pouted, and looked at the large bulge in Tony’s jacket. “So, what do you have there? What’s up with the formula and bottles? Did you and Mrs. Stark finally have a baby? Can I see it?” Tony frowned. “Leave. Now.” Thor smiled, and walked out of the building. “Well, let me know when you want to introduce me to the little one!” Tony rolled his eyes, and took the elevator back to the guest room.

    Tony went to the guest kitchen and filled up the bottle with fiji water and measured out the baby formula and shook the bottle. “Okay time to eat” He pointed the bottle at Peter but the baby kept turning his face away. “What? I thought you were hungry.” Tony just remembered that he needed to heat up the bottle. He bottle in the microwave and heated it for ten seconds. He tested the bottle on his wrist and when it was the perfect temperature he fed the baby.

    Peter smiled and he gulped down the bottle. Tony smiled and put the bottle in the sink. “Okay little guy, I'm going to need you to be very quiet for an hour okay. I’ll buy you something” Peter looked confused. Tony sighed and shook his head “You’re a baby you don't want me to buy you stuff.” Peter suddenly squealed happily. “Okay good boy.”

    Tony wrapped up Peter and made his way into the office. Pepper was there with he arms crossed as she glared at Tony. “You’re late.” she suddenly noticed the bags under his eyes and she felt her heart tense up. “...Please tell me you haven't been drinking again.”

    Tony nodded sadly, he couldn’t lie to Pepper. Especially after how much emotional pain he's caused her after his addiction. Tony sat beside Pepper and looked at their bald therapist. Dr.Bill.

    “Hello, Mr. Stark. How have you been coping with your addiction? Would you mind telling me where this all started? Was there any specific event that triggered it?”

Tony held tightly onto the coat jacket, but not too hard, so that he wouldn’t hurt baby Peter.

    “Well, I mean, when you’re constantly risking your life for humanity. I’m just tired. I don’t see how drinking to lift my spirits every once in a while is such a huge problem. I’m an adult, for christ’s sake.” Tony rolled his eyes.

    Dr. Bill furrowed his brow. “No one is trying to make you out to be the villain here, Mr. Stark. I just would like to know if anything in particular has made you feel the urge to drink. Mrs. Stark told me that you had drank before, but not to this extent.”

Tony glanced at Pepper, who was sitting up straight in her chair, but looked as if she was about to burst into tears. Tony felt sick. His hands started to sweat, and he could feel his chest tightening.

“I...I have to get some air. Excuse me.” Tony dashed out of the room, and took the elevator down to the first floor. The moment he stepped outside Stark Tower, a crowd of paparazzi swarmed around him. Flashes of light nearly blinded him, and he began to feel dizzy.

“Mr. Stark, is it true that you’ve been having an affair?”

“Mr. Stark, have you been taking any kind of drugs? You never go out into the public anymore! Are you hiding something?”

“Mr. Stark, you were seen last night with a baby at the ER in Queens! Who’s baby was it? Have you had a child in secret from your wife?”

Tony felt nauseous. He held onto Peter, and he felt the baby squirming in his arms. Peter began to cry, and Tony started to panic. Suddenly, a group of bodyguards showed up behind Tony, and Pepper grabbed Tony by the arm. The bodyguards blocked off the entrance, and prevented any more paparazzi from harassing Tony.

Pepper dragged Tony into their bedroom and she quickly locked the door. She stared at him with tears welling up in her eyes. “Is it true, you've been seeing someone else? Is that why you’ve been leaving every night?”

Tony’s breaths were rapid as he desperately shook his head. “No, honey I swear I haven’t been seeing anyone else. I wouldn’t do that to you.”

Pepper suddenly broke down and sat on the bed. “Then why do you have a baby?! We are both upset that I’m infertile, but you would just get up a leave that quickly?! What happened to you telling me everything would be alright and that we would figure things out?! Was that just to get my guard down so you could start a family without me!” Pepper couldn’t speak anymore, her cries grew stronger and more painful as the thought of never having kids circled her head like a broken record player.

Tony’s heart shattered and he looked down at teary-eyed Peter before sitting down beside Pepper. He poured himself out to her, trying to keep himself from breaking out into tears. “Honey, It’s true I leave every night, but not because I would cheat on you. I would never do that to you. To be honest I go out every night to drink. I mean this whole thing about Bucky killing my parents and the infertility problem has weakened me. Last night, I saw this man on a motorcycle shoot a car’s tire and the car drove into the wall. The parents in the car were dying and they begged me to save their son. That’s how I got the baby, and the who emergency room thing was because he had a broken leg. Pepper I’m sorry I made you feel betrayed, but you have to believe me I would never do anything that would intentionally hurt you.”

Pepper’s eyes widened. “Tony...why did you hide all of this from me? I wish you would trust me a bit more. I mean, we’re married now, and communication is important. I know you’ve always sucked at it, but you really need to try to be more open with me. I’ve been so worried about you, Tony...I love you. Please, I don’t want us to suffer because of this, okay? We’ll get through this together. I promise.” Pepper held tightly onto Tony’s hand, and kissed him on the cheek. Tony started tearing up, and wiped his eyes.

“What about the baby? I know, he’s not ours, but I can’t just leave him alone. He needs someone to be there for him. I promised his parents.” Tony held onto Peter’s tiny hands, and smiled.

Pepper sighed, and ran her fingers through Tony’s hair. “I understand, but this is a huge responsibility. And right now, you can barely take care of yourself. Are you sure that this is a good idea? We could try to find him a good family who would like to adopt him, or…”

Tony looked at Pepper with sad eyes. “I can’t do that. I’m sorry, I just...can’t. I’ve already become attached to him, and I feel responsible for his life. But, I need your help. I know you don’t like it, but could you give it a chance? I know I’m asking a lot, but I want to take care of him.”

Pepper glanced at Peter and tears started to fill her eyes again. “...Okay…” she sighed and lead herself out of the bedroom.

Tony sighed and looked down at Peter, “She’ll love you eventually...I promise.” Peter sneezed and Tony got up and chased Pepper. “Hey, I know this may be too soon but do you want to help me picked out stuff for his room?”

Pepper sighed. She didn’t like to admit it, but she used to always tell Tony how she would decorate a baby’s room. She looked up at Tony and gave him gently smile. “Alright, just let me grab my coat.” she kissed Tony and ran back to their bedroom.

Tony smiled at Peter and tickled his belly. “We got her this time.” Peter started giggling, but he nuzzled up to Tony when he saw Happy. Tony really didn't want to explain himself again, so he carefully shoved the baby into Happy’s arms. “Oh Happy uh this is Peter he’s your new boss...uh watch him for me okay? Thanks buddy, bye!” before Happy could respond, Tony ran off.

Peter’s tummy started to rumble because he wasn’t burped.Tears filled his eyes before throwing up all over Happy and his new suit. Peter looked at the mess and started giggling uncontrollably.

“Tony, if he ever does something like this again, I swear, I’m going to quit.” Happy had told himself the same thing for years. Peter smiled at Happy, and grabbed onto Happy’s tie. Happy was extremely uncomfortable, as he wasn’t very fond of babies. “Well, kid, whoever you are, I hope you don’t cause me too much trouble while Tony is gone. I’m not that nice of a guy.” Peter giggled again, and yanked on Happy’s tie. Happy put Peter down on the carpet, and went onto Care.com to find a temporary nanny for the little guy. “Sorry, kid, but I have a busy schedule, and I don’t have time to play with you right now.” Happy was scrolling through the app, when he realized that his phone was ringing. He picked up to answer, and he could hear Thor’s voice.

“Hello? Is this the Happy man? I saw Tony earlier, and I was wondering if I could come by and visit the baby! Is it a bad time?” Thor sounded excited, so Happy took advantage of the situation.

“Of course, in fact, Tony wants you to have some one-on-one time with the little guy! So come on over! Like, right now! PLEASE.”

Thor arrived at Stark Tower within 10 minutes.

Thor dialed Happy’s number. “Hello? Mr. Happy man? I’m here to hang out with the child!”

    “Oh yeah, of course, come right up. Just jump in the elevator and I’ll send you up here.”

    Thor reached the floor that Happy was on, and saw Happy walking towards him, with a baby in his arms. Happy’s suit was still ruined, stained with Peter’s puke.

    “Uh, are you okay? You have...baby vomit all over you.” Thor tried to smile, but he could tell that Happy was...not happy.

    “Just take the kid. I have places to be, and I need to take a shower before I’m late to my next meeting.” Happy shoved Peter into Thor’s arms, and walked off without saying another word. Thor looked down at Peter, who was blowing bubbles with his spit. He noticed that Peter was wearing a cast on his leg.

    “Oh, you hurt your leg. The cast is pink, so that must mean that you’re a girl! How cute. I wonder what your name is. I wish the happy man would have told me before he left so quickly. Oh well. Let’s go on an adventure!” Thor took Peter outside, and looked around. “Hmm, I’m not sure what babies do on Earth. Maybe we should just go explore your daddy’s building! I’m sure there’s plenty of cool things to see there.” Thor headed back inside the building with Peter in his arms.

    Peter squealed and Thor started to laugh. “Good idea little girl.” Thor carried Peter into Tony and Pepper’s walk in closet. “Okay little girl pick something.” Peter tilted his head and reached for a silky dress. Thor pulled the dress off of the hanger, but he was too strong and he ended up ripping the straps. “Oh...oops.” Suddenly Peter started crying. “Hey little girl it’s going to be okay. How about we make the happy man happy again. Wanna draw a picture?” Peter stopped crying and Thor grabbed the bag with Pepper’s lipsticks and made his way to Happy’s room.

    The room was very monochromatic, Thor did not approve. He laid Peter on the carpet and dumped the lipsticks on the floor. “So what color do you like? Pink, red, orange? Well come on, pick something.” Thor sighed and shook his head. “Here let me show you.” Thor grabbed a purple lipstick and drew a poorly drawn picture of Happy with puke on him. “See it’s easy. Now you try.” He handed Peter a red lipstick, but Peter couldn't hold his head up so he smashed the lipstick into the wall.

    Thor shook his head. “Well one day you will be as good as me.” Thor continued to draw all of the Avengers with different lipsticks until he noticed that Peter fell asleep. Thor chuckled and made his way to the private gym. While he was gone, Peter rolled under Happy’s bed.

    45 minutes passed and Happy returned from his meet, soon followed by Pepper and Tony with a truck full of baby stuff. “Good to see you again Tony, Pepper” said Happy. “The kid threw up on me, you better talk to him before it becomes a routine thing.”

    Tony laughed, and Pepper smacked him in the head. “Of course, Happy. Thank you for taking care of him while we were gone.” She glared at Tony.

    “Yes, I’m sorry I just left Peter with you like that, I’ll try not to do it again. Now. where is the little man?”

Happy smiled. “Oh, I called over one of your friends to watch him while I was gone. You know how busy I can get, Tony. They should be in my room. I’ll go get them.” Happy walked into his room, and saw lipstick on the walls. It looked like a child had been drawing shitty pictures of the Avengers.

    “What the hell happened here? Thor! Thor? Where are you? WHERE’S THE KID!?” Happy was starting to panic. He should have known better than to leave the baby with Thor, since Thor often acted like a child himself. “Kid, where are you? Oh god, please be alive!” Happy looked in the restroom, in the closet, and under his chair, but he couldn’t find Peter. Suddenly, he heard giggling from under his bed. “Is that you down there, little guy?” Happy stuck his head under his bed, and he saw the baby laying down on his stomach, chewing on lipstick, and smiling. “Oh god, Tony’s gonna kill me.” He pulled the baby out from under the bed.

    “Why am I going to kill you?” Happy heard Tony’s voice behind him. He turned around, holding Peter in his arms, who was still chewing on Pepper’s lipstick.

    “Why is Peter eating a stick of lipstick!? And why was he under the bed? Where the hell is Thor? I can’t believe you actually thought it was a good idea to ask Thor to watch him! You know how much of an idiot he can be!” Tony started to lose his breath. Pepper walked in a few moments later, and screamed.

    “Oh my god! What happened to your room, Happy? And--why is the baby eating my lipstick! Where did he get that from? What’s going on!? Where is Thor?” Pepper was fuming, and she looked like she was ready to punch Happy in the face.

    Peter’s tummy started to hurt from ingesting a thing of lipstick. He looked up at Happy and his tummy started to gargle. A few seconds later Peter threw up on him again. Happy was unamused and he pushed the baby into Tony’s arms.Happy rolled his eyes and threw his jacket off. “Tony you need to talk to that kid!”

    Pepper started laughing as she saw the misery on Happy’s face. “Well you deserve that. And he's just a baby, he can’t control it. So where is Thor?” Suddenly Thor stepped in behind them with a towel wrapped around his thick waist.

    “Did someone call me? Oh hey you’re back, I took really good care of your daughter. We did some arts and crafts and then she took a nap.”

    Tony shook his heard groaned. “His name is Peter.”

    “Peter? What a weird name for a little girl.” said Thor.

    “He’s a boy.”

    “A boy? But he has a pink cast, that must mean he's a little girl.”

    “Boys can wear a pink cast...So do you want to explain this?” said Tony as he gestured to the wall covered in lipstick.

    Thor smiled and plopped himself onto Happy’s bed. “Sure, thats happy man in the purple, that me in the red and…”

    “I mean the mess.”

    “What mess? We just used some of Pepper’s crayons. The little guy and I wanted to make the happy guy, well uh… happy again. Does Pepper not like to share her crayons?”

Pepper rolled her eyes, and shook her head. “Thor, those aren’t crayons. That’s my lipstick. You know, makeup? I use it on my face. Not. On. The. Walls.”

Thor looked confused, and scratched his head. “That’s dumb. Why would you use it on your face while you could make masterpieces like mine? I can create art with your...uh, sticks for your lips.”

Tony held Peter in his arms. He smiled, and tickled him. “You’ve been causing a lot of trouble, little man. Let’s get you into the bath to get you clean.” Tony took Peter into his bedroom, while Pepper scolded Happy and Thor.

Tony carefully put Peter in his bathroom sink, and scrubbed all of the lipstick off of him. Pepper watched Tony wash Peter, and smiled. She still felt weird about taking care of the kid, but she was happy that Tony seemed to be showing a more paternal side of himself. She walked up behind him, and kissed him on the neck.

Tony kissed Pepper on the lips, and smiled warmly. After he finished drying off Peter, he grabbed a pair of new pajamas for him. Peter giggled as Tony put on his pajamas.

Tony picked Peter up, and cradled him in his arms. “I hope I can be a good dad, Peter. I don’t want to disappoint your parents, now do I?” Tony tried rocking Peter back and forth, but he didn’t know how to do it properly, and Peter began to squirm in his arms. “Hey, I’m gonna drop you if you keep doing that, cut it out!”

Pepper sighed, and tapped on Tony’s shoulder. “Here, let me hold him.”

Tony nodded, and gave Peter to Pepper. She held him in her arms, and rocked him back and forth, very gently. She swayed her hips, and hummed to herself. Within a few minutes, Peter drifted off to sleep.

Tony looked dumbfounded. “How did you do that? I was doing the same thing, but he just wouldn’t calm down. Maybe I’m not cut out for this parenting thing.”

Pepper laughed quietly, and smiled. “Well, I’ve done a lot of research on this kind of thing, so I know a few tricks. I doubt that’s something you’ve done before.”

Tony chuckled, he always thought it was cute when Pepper got sassy. “Hey I’ve researched...kind of. Okay not really. So uh where do we let the kid sleep for now?”

Pepper shrugged as she held Peter close to her. “We could always have him sleep in between us...Or maybe Happy would like to have him for a night.” giggled Pepper. Tony grinned as the meandered back to their bedroom.

“I’m pretty sure he’d kill us if we’d did that...but it would be kinda funny,”

“You know I’m joking right?” Peter on his baby blanket and carefully wrapped him up like a little burrito. She sat beside Tony and gently took his hand in hers. “Hey Tony? Do you think maybe we could set up the room for Peter instead of hiring someone? I think it would be more heartfelt if we did it ourselves.”  
    “I was thinking the same thing.” Tony gently kissed Pepper and they both got changed into their pajamas.

“Thor owes me a new dress...I don’t know how but he ripped the straps.” said Pepper. The two of them got onto opposite sides of Peter and clapped their hands to shut off the lights. “Tony… Thank you.”

**Author's Note:**

> This chapter is sponsored by Postmates and Care.com and funded in part by viewers like you. Thank you.


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